There was a time when I thought my anxiety was just part of the chaos of life, a background hum that everyone dealt with in their own way. But one day, during a routine shift at the hospital, everything changed. The night was relatively calm for labor and delivery. I wasn’t overwhelmed, and nothing in particular seemed out of the ordinary. Then, out of nowhere, I felt it—my heart started racing, my chest tightened, and it felt like the walls of the room were closing in on me. I struggled to catch my breath, and in that moment, I genuinely thought I was dying.
It wasn’t the first time I’d had a panic attack, but this one was different. It wasn’t triggered by an external stressor; it just happened. It caught me completely off guard. After that night, I realized this wasn’t just anxiety I could push to the side or power through. This was something more, and it had begun to take control of my life in ways I hadn’t acknowledged before.
I was terrified that the next attack could come at any moment—while driving, during a shift, or even while spending time with family and friends. The fear of having another attack was enough to keep me on edge constantly, which only fed the cycle of panic and anxiety. I couldn’t keep living this way.
That was when I realized I needed help. I sought therapy, and that became the turning point for me. My therapist helped me understand the nature of panic disorder—that these attacks were my body’s alarm system malfunctioning, going off when there was no real threat. We worked on breathing exercises, grounding techniques, and cognitive-behavioral strategies to challenge the catastrophic thoughts that triggered my panic.
The road to managing my anxiety wasn’t easy or quick. There were days when it felt like progress was impossible, and the smallest setback would send me spiraling. But slowly, I started to regain some control. I began to understand my body’s cues and could recognize when I was heading toward another episode, giving me time to use the tools I’d learned to ground myself.
During this process, I also rediscovered the therapeutic power of creativity. What started as a way to unwind after long, stressful shifts turned into something much more significant. When I was pouring wax, choosing fragrances, and creating candles, I felt present. It was a rare feeling for someone who’d spent so long stuck in a cycle of anxiety. That space where I could focus on nothing but the process—on the slow, intentional motions of crafting something with my hands—was a space free from panic.
Vibe & Glo became a lifeline for me. It wasn’t just about creating a business; it was about creating peace. In those moments of stillness, as I watched the candles take shape, I realized I was also reshaping my relationship with my mental health. The business gave me a purpose beyond the panic, and it helped me reclaim a sense of calm that I hadn’t felt in years.
Through therapy, self-care practices like journaling and meditation, and the creative outlet of candle-making, I started to heal. I don’t want to pretend that my panic disorder disappeared overnight, or that it’s something I never struggle with anymore. It’s still there, but now I feel equipped to handle it. I no longer live in fear of the next attack, and that in itself is liberating.
In building Vibe & Glo, I’ve also realized how important it is to create spaces and experiences that promote mental health and wellness for others. I understand what it’s like to feel overwhelmed, like the world is spinning too fast, and you just can’t keep up. That’s why I hope, in some small way, Vibe & Glo offers a moment of peace to others who may be struggling too.
My journey with panic disorder is ongoing, but it’s also one of transformation. Creating this brand became part of my healing process, and now it’s a reminder that even in the face of overwhelming anxiety, we can still find ways to carve out peace.
With love,
Mikayla Tani, MSN, RN, C-EFM
Founder of Vibe & Glo Candle Studio